Nerd Drama 29 July 2009

I used to play D&D weekly. I would meet up with everybody in my friend’s parent’s basement. It always smelled like spilled soda and pizza. Sometime puke as well.

Alcohol-induced role-playing gets pretty interesting sometimes. Psh, what am I saying. Sometimes? No, every session was insane. Our characters would get stuff done in the beginning. Stuff like going to the right place, kinda. Then killing the “bad guys”. But as the night progressed, we would have our characters forget the quest we were on and bother NPCs. Stab a few here, cast a spell on them there…

Now, anyone can tell you that when you have too much alcohol, you can’t really focus on anything. So the game would be put aside and we would just talk. Sometimes we would still talk in character, which made things even harder to understand.

Later in the night the talking would stop and there would just be dancing. What kind of music did we listen to? Some metal or rock… How did we dance to it? Not well. In fact, there was a lot of falling and laughing.

Now, alcohol and me didn’t mix very well back then. So whoever I was dancing with I would start hugging them and get a little too intimate before I had to rush to the bathroom to puke my guts out.

Every week this happened. I never got further than a rubbing hug with anyone. But when the group was smaller… We were just going to play some xbox. The night began with epic war games in a hotel room. It was fun until I started having weird drinks with Italian names.

The games got boring so we went back to our friend’s house. I had had so much to drink by this time, I didn’t notice a few people were gone. They had gone home or something. But me and one other person were still close together. We started making out on the couch, but eventually I had to throw up. I had toooo many drinks.

The next thing I remember is waking up on top of this guy. Our clothes are all on, but both of us are really sweaty. I had a really bad headache.  Oh, and did I mention that I had a boyfriend at the time? It wasn’t the guy I woke up on top of, either. The thing is, the guy who was under me had nothing to drink. I don’t remember putting any moves on him.

Feeling like a guilty girlfriend, I told my boyfriend what had happened as soon as I got home. Though, I did neglect to tell him that his “friend” had nothing to drink and I did. So, that relationship was sabotaged. Too bad, too. He was a great role-playing partner ;) (jk, we know what’s going on).

After that D&D was awkward. I was known as the nerd-girl-whore. I’m not sure they actually called me that, but I would… There was nothing I could do, either. They were my only nerd group. Growing up in a small city does that :( My D&D days were over. Until now…

World of Warcraft 29 May 2009

My boyfriend created an account for me today. He made me complete just one quest before I could naysay it. Of course, being the nerd I am I could not resist. WoW is just too amazing to put down.  Lucky for me I have friends that love it, too. I don’t have to wait an insane amount of time to download it myself before I play. The time I have to wait for, though, is for them to drop off the discs. Then it will download in no time.

I have have gone this long before I played the game. I knew that I would become addicted. I love roleplaying games. I love fantasy games in general. Before trying it, I knew that once I played for just a little bit, that a lot of my money will go to it. I dread it. I don’t have a job currently :( There are plenty of opportunities here, but I don’t know where to look. My standards as an employee have gone down.

Australia keeps looming in on my plans. I leave on July 4th! That is sooooo soon. I haven’t even bought the clothes I want to bring down there yet! And now with WoW, my expenses are disappearing before I have the money. And since I am going to college this fall instead of next fall. Yikes. Oh well, I’ll be having fun along the way.

Haiku for You 10 May 2009

Music is for us
To express, relieve, and own
It is personal.

Nothing is similar
The way you express yourself
I did find you.

Battle and SG
‘Twas our beloved fantasy
SciFi and pizza.

Swine Flu 10 May 2009

Alaska has been hit with the swine flu. My little brother was born a few weeks ago and I’m really worried about him. Hopefully this thing will die down instead of mutating and getting worse by autumn like the 1918 incident. *crosses fingers* We’ll see.

Goin’ to Australia 10 May 2009

I play the string bass (aka giant violin). On July 4th the youth symphony I’m in is going to Australia! Instead of celebrating with fireworks the US Independence, I get to be on a 15 hour flight and miss all of the festivities. But the Sydney Opera House will welcome me, sure enough.  Practicing an average 10 hours a week is brutal, but will be worth it. We are going to be playing Gloria by Poulenc, Colas Breugnon by Kabalevsky, and Beethoven’s 9th Symphony.

Since I will be graduating high school soon, I have to think about what college I would like to go to. Music or engineering is going to be my major. I would like to go to a college that would allow me to double major, but that is hopeful thinking. Next year I will be finishing my high school credits with a local college’s Early Honors Program. There, I will be able to have college level courses, but still be enrolled in my high school to go to prom and take electives and such. That will give me a headstart on what I want in a college, but I need to do my homework.

One thing I promise to do during the summer is PRACTICE! I lost my metronome. :( But there are free online metronomes. :) So far with my 10 hours of practice a week, I begin to learn about what I’m playing. But getting to know music is like getting to know a friend. I want music to be my best friend, and in order to do that I have to spend more time with it. Which, for now, gets in the way of my social life. There are not very many small group music pieces that have bass included. If there are, I haven’t been able to find them.

My boyfriend is really into music as well, though he practices a little less on bass. I have noticed that musicians like to be together. All the musicians I know that are married, are married to other musicians. It is a great, yet terrible thing. I have noticed in my relationship the thing we argue about most is music. Whenever there is an insturment around (we have plenty between us: two ukuleles, a charango, a piano, four basses, three guitars, two keyboards, three drums, etc) we can’t help but play with it for a little while. It gets annoying when you are trying to have a conversation with someone and they are focusing and making random noises music.

Well, I would like to find lovely bass duets, and bass-piano duets, but living in Alaska makes it hard. I don’t even know where to start looking. I can order online, but I would like suggestions. Also, I’m looking to buy Bel Canto strings, but they are expensive. I lost my job at Best Buy (stupid manager) but I plan on getting one soon. I might stoop so low as to get a job at a fast food place. *sigh* Oh well. The music is worth it.

The MPAA 23 September 2008

“It’s a really filthy movie. I hear they are having some problems getting an R rating from an NC-17 rating, which is never good.” He concluded with “They [fight against] sex stuff. Isn’t that weird? It’s really crazy to me that ‘Hostel’ is fine, with people gouging their eyes out and shit like that, but you can’t show two people having sex — that’s too much.”
–Kevin Smith

“The movie ratings system is a voluntary system operated by the MPAA and the National Association of Theater Owners (NATO). The ratings are given by a board of parents who comprise the Classification and Rating Administration (CARA). CARA?s Board members view each film and, after a group discussion, vote on its rating. The ratings are intended to provide parents with advance information so they can decide for themselves which films are appropriate for viewing by their own children. The Board uses the same criteria as any parent making a judgment ? theme, language, violence, nudity, sex and drug use are among content areas considered in the decision-making process.”
–MPAA

What are American parents trying to say about violence over sex when voting for the rating of movies after they watch them? Perhaps after allowing their kids more aggressive, angry, vindictive violence for entertainment purposes they will think of violence as wrong! Maybe? Are you sure? That’s what I thought. Allowing fewer sex scenes and more violence may lead viewers to subconsciously think that violence is prefered over sex.

Personally, at my young age, I could tell you a few results of what parents let their kids watch. My fellow peers have to go to anger management meetings every week. A lot of them deny having anger issues but are less popular and seldom have friends. There are kids who make fun of others, bullying, teasing, downright attacking verbally others’ because they have no other release. Had sex not been shunned by our society, we might be a bit more peaceful. If there were more sex scenes in movies it would be easier for parents to have the “big talk” with their kids. Sex releases hormones that no other activity can compensate for. These hormones bring a sense of happiness. What I get from this is that, on average, America would be happier with more sex scenes in movies.

Parents will be able to talk more easily with their kids. Teens will know more about the gritty details of sex: STDs do exist, pregnancy is possible, sex isn’t bad. Violence may take a nose dive in society. Really, MPAA? How is it that gorey torture is worse that a few naked people enjoying themselves in a humane manner?

A Haiku for Autumn 16 September 2008

Green leaves turn to brown
Then they all dance to the ground
The trees are left bare

Time 7 September 2008

Things change in time.

It is just what happens.

Nothing can escape it.

Her absense, his smile 7 September 2008

On that last day we stared,
I couldn’t stop the flood
from pouring out my soul.

A reassuring hand fell on my shoulder,
Soft fingers rubbed my stiff neck
We were all suffering.

A glance at the bed was all that was needed.
She was inflated, kidneys had failed hours ago
No movement but tears carving their place in her cheeks.

No longer than an hour later
The monitor showed a flat, green line
All in the room was silent.

Then singing, singing from the oldest of times,
Old Alaskan songs comforted us, brought us back
To memories of prior generations.

No longer will her smile comfort me.
It is replaced with a different kind of love.

He hugs me, comforts me in the loss I’ve endured
The woman who raised me is gone, no longer suffering
But he know that it’ll take time and he just waits.

Everything’s gone, she’s gone, so is the foundation.
What happens when your foundation crumbles?
They don’t teach you that in school.

With nothing but my bare soul to share he listens
Patiently waiting for my face to dry, smiling and comforting
Every minute she’s gone, he’s here to help me through it.

Life waits for nothing, no one
We are all stuck in a race
but if we just sit back, enjoy the time we have
We could truly be happy

There is an end to each story
It must sometime be reached

Australia 12 July 2008

The Anchorage Youth Symphony will be representing the United States in an upcoming event in Sydney Australia next year. I am lucky enough to be a part of this symphony. Also, I am even more lucky to have my boyfriend sit next to me the whole way (hopefully).